Forgiveness

The beginning of this journey started with intense anger...not because of Ron's tumor but because of an uncaring doctor who repeatedly told Ron his headaches were caused by stress.

Last night Ron and I were talking about this and whether or not it was worth our while to seek legal advise. I was talking to a wonder friend about this today and she gave me some very good advise...forgive him.

We have held on to this anger for months now, I think it is time to let it go. Keeping such bitterness in our hearts really holds us back from growing in our faith and truly holds Ron back from God's healing touch.

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. Colossians 3:13

Missing my Life

I think there are times where I'm too positive...I know, I know...how can you be too positive.

I'm always the one who says things are great, Ron is doing so well...everything is just wonderful. It isn't always that way...today was one of those days. Ron had a seizure when we were heading out in the afternoon, we went for a walk yesterday and it was great... he didn't make it out today. My brother and his family were here for dinner tonight and Ron was really fighting a seizure...he didn't go right into it but came pretty close.

It is hard, it is so hard to watch a once strong man who took care of his family have to be helped up and back into a chair. The fact that he can't be left on his own because of his blindness and mobility issues. It is hard to try and balance myself between my daughter and my husband. Trying to see that Michaela doesn't miss too much because of Ron's illness I don't want her resenting her daddy because she can't do some things.

Don't get me wrong, I know all of the things I have to be thankful for. I have a loving supportive family, a wonderful church family and a loving caring God. But I miss my life from 6 months ago, I miss what we had, I miss being carefree...I miss Ron.

Relaxing

Well tonight we are just relaxing. Ron is listening to the hockey game and I'm just sitting enjoying the fact that I can use the laptop to access the internet again (so are several Ebay sellers)!!

We have had a great first week at home, I've had a few "poor me" moments but after some prayer I begin to feel better about things. We are so fortunate to be home, Ron is feeling good and is actually feeling seizures come so he is better able to control them. One of Ron's home support workers actually connected him to a woman in a town near us who has the same type of brain tumor...that is an amazing gift from God. He finally has someone to talk to that he can relate to, he doesn't feel so alone in this.

I've had so much help this week, my sister was here to help organize my family room...trying to get rid of Michaela's old toys. My brother stayed with Ron while we were downstairs...my friend's kids came and took Michaela to the park one afternoon. I'm so fortunate to have so many people in my life there for us...now if only I had a friend to help me organize my food cupboard.

Well I guess I should get down and finish some laundry!!

Being Home

Well we've been home for 6 days now and it has been wonderful. We did hit a speedbump on Monday, Ron had a siezure and I had to call the ambulance. We were in emerg for a few hours and then we were able to come home. Just an extra shot of dilantin and we were on our way. We had really been pushing things with Ron and I think that is what happened, now we're taking things a bit easier.

I've been so busy running around the house answering Ron and Michaela's calls...plus organizing a house that I haven't been in for a few months!! But it is so nice to get things done...and now I finally have my laptop working so I don't need to run up and downstairs to get online.

Anyway I will be able to update this blog much more often now.

I truly appreciate all of your prayers...please keep them coming

Coming Home

Well tomorrow we'll be coming home. The doctor has said Ron is able to come home!! WooHoo!!

We will have home support come in to help and he will need some aid getting around...but it will be so nice to be home again. Ron has lost his sight, we are praying that it will come back but we just don't know what will happen. He is getting stronger every day and is feeling very good!

He finished his first round of chemo (5 more to go), he had no side effects...truly an answer to prayer.

Well I'd better get back to the hospital...one more sleep!!!